Why Am I Still Hurting? Finding Hope When Healing Takes Time
By Sarah Rybicki | The Rybickulous Faith Podcast
Have you ever looked at something you've been carrying and thought:
“I should be over this by now.”
Maybe you've prayed about it. You've forgiven. You've gone to counseling. You've studied Scripture. You love Jesus and genuinely trust God.
And yet…the grief still comes.
The anxiety still surfaces.
The shame occasionally whispers.
Does that mean you're failing at healing? Does it mean you don't have enough faith?
In this episode of The Rybickulous Faith Podcast, returning guest Julie Rebboah, MS, Christian Nervous System Coach and creator of Biblical Breathwork™, joins me for an honest conversation about what it means to flourish in hope while you're still healing.
And perhaps one of the most important truths from our conversation is this:
Healing doesn't have to be finished before God can begin helping you flourish.
“I Should Be Over This By Now”
There can be tremendous pressure—both culturally and within Christian spaces—to recover quickly.
We want the testimony with the beautiful ending.
I struggled. God showed up. I'm healed.
Praise God when healing happens that way.
But sometimes healing is a journey.
Julie reminds us that healing is a process that cannot be rushed. What we've experienced matters, and giving ourselves permission to acknowledge pain isn't the same as allowing pain to define us.
There is grace for the process.
God isn't intimidated by the parts of your story that are still tender.
Christians Are Allowed to Have Emotions
Fear.
Anger.
Grief.
Sadness.
Anxiety.
Sometimes Christians become uncomfortable with these emotions because we believe we're supposed to immediately replace them with something more "faithful."
We may quote a Bible verse without ever acknowledging what we're actually feeling.
We may tell ourselves to give it to God while never allowing ourselves to grieve.
We may even feel guilty for being sad because we know we're supposed to have joy.
But experiencing an emotion isn't the same thing as allowing that emotion to rule your life.
Emotions can be gifts, not excuses.
They can tell us something about what we're experiencing and reveal places that need our attention, prayer, support, or healing.
Naming Your Emotions Can Be an Act of Faith
One of the ideas Julie shares in this conversation is beautifully simple:
Notice it. Name it. Bring it before God.
Naming an emotion isn't complaining to God.
It isn't admitting defeat.
It's honesty.
Scripture gives us countless examples of people bringing their unfiltered emotions before the Lord. The Psalms alone contain grief, confusion, anger, fear, loneliness, desperation—and extraordinary faith.
Biblical hope doesn't require us to pretend.
We can say:
"God, I'm afraid."
"I'm angry."
"I'm grieving."
"I'm exhausted."
And then invite Him into that place.
God already knows what's in our hearts. Bringing it to Him allows our relationship with Him to become a place of honesty rather than performance.
When Grief Starts Looking Like Anxiety
Grief doesn't always look like crying.
Sometimes unresolved grief can surface as anxiety, exhaustion, irritability, sleeplessness, or feeling constantly overwhelmed.
That's one reason simply telling someone to "stop worrying" isn't always helpful.
There may be something underneath the anxiety that needs compassion and attention.
Maybe it's a death.
Maybe it's the end of a relationship.
Maybe it's a dream that didn't happen.
Maybe it's losing the life you thought you'd have.
Grief deserves room to be acknowledged.
And we don't have to walk through it alone.
Community Is Part of Healing
One of the strongest themes throughout our conversation is the importance of community.
We were never designed to carry everything ourselves.
Sometimes healing requires having someone beside you who can say:
“I'm here.”
Not someone who immediately tries to fix everything.
Not someone who offers a cliché.
Someone willing to sit with you in the difficult place.
Christian community should be a place where people are allowed to bring their real lives—not just their Sunday-morning versions of themselves.
Our struggles may be deeply personal, but they don't have to become deeply isolating.
The Gospel Has Something to Say About Shame
Grief says, “I lost something.”
Fear says, “Something might happen.”
But shame often goes deeper.
Shame says:
“Something is wrong with me.”
That's why our identity in Christ matters so much.
The Gospel doesn't simply give us strategies for becoming better versions of ourselves. Jesus gives us a new identity.
Our failures aren't our identity.
Our trauma isn't our identity.
Our anxiety isn't our identity.
Our past isn't our identity.
For those who belong to Christ, our identity rests in Him.
And when shame tries to tell us who we are, we can answer it with what God has already declared to be true.
You Can Flourish While You're Still Healing
We often imagine flourishing as the destination at the end of healing.
Once I get through this, then I'll flourish.
But what if flourishing can happen during the process?
You can still grow while grieving.
You can discover deeper faith while asking difficult questions.
You can experience moments of joy while carrying sadness.
You can serve God while you're still healing.
You can recognize His faithfulness even when you don't understand the entire story yet.
Flourishing doesn't necessarily mean the absence of adversity.
Sometimes it means growing through adversity with God.
Look Back and Remember God's Faithfulness
Julie and I also talk about something beautifully practical: prayer journaling.
When we're in the middle of a difficult season, it can be hard to recognize what God is doing.
But when we look back?
We begin noticing things.
Prayers He answered.
Doors He closed.
People He sent.
Strength we didn't know we had.
Moments when He carried us.
Keeping a record of our prayers gives us something tangible to revisit when the next difficult season comes.
We can look backward and say:
God was faithful there. I can trust Him here.
Flourish in Hope Virtual Christian Women's Retreat
This conversation also leads into something special Julie is participating in this September.
🌿 Flourish in Hope is a virtual Christian women's retreat happening Saturday, September 19, 2026.
Four coaches will come together to address four deeply connected areas:
Anxiety • Grief • Shame • Identity in Christ
The retreat is designed for women navigating real-life struggles who are ready to stop believing they "should be over this by now" and instead learn to bring themselves honestly and fully before God.
You can connect with Julie and learn more at:
📷 Instagram: @biblicalbreathwork
You Don't Have to Rush Your Testimony
If you're reading this while carrying something you thought would have healed by now, I hope you'll remember this:
Your healing taking time doesn't mean God isn't working.
Bring Him the grief.
Bring Him the questions.
Bring Him the anger.
Bring Him the anxiety.
Bring Him the part of you that wonders why you're still struggling.
You don't have to clean up your emotions before approaching the One who created you.
Notice.
Name.
Bring it honestly before God.
And keep walking.
Because you don't have to wait until every wound has healed to begin flourishing in hope.
🎙️ Watch or listen to:Why Am I Still Hurting? Finding Hope When Healing Takes Time | Julie Rebboah
The Rybickulous Faith Podcast
Real Stories. Real Faith. Rybickulous Hope.
Shalom, y'all. Keep sharing your Rybickulous Faith.
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